Loving Well
February 2023
“The value of our relationships is a healthier indicator of net worth than our bank accounts.” – Miles Adcox.
Truer words were never said. Financial wealth, the consumption of things, and the idea that whomever dies with the most toys wins has become our cultural yardstick for success. However, the acquisition of stuff does not constitute winning, nor does it indicate true happiness. Remember, you can’t take any of it with you, upon departure.
In my 60+ years of life, I’ve found that cultivating important relationships brings me the most joy. Making memories with my bride, my children and my inner circle of trusted friends brings me my soul food. These memories can never be bought or sold. Memories and the collection of memories is what makes my heart smile most. I feel rich with the knowledge that none of these people will so much remember the things that I said, but they rather, how I made them feel.
Living a life in recovery frees me to show up each day as the best version of my authentic self. Recovery is the gateway to building wealth, through showing up each day with a servant heart and no agenda. Giving yourself away and expecting nothing in return seems to me to be the best recipe for finding joy and value in our lives. While my disease was active for 20 plus years, I was honestly always looking for what I could get out of a relationship. Today, I look for what I can bring to a relationship to make it more meaningful.
Now, my intention each day is to love well. This starts by fully addressing my need for radical self-forgiveness, self-care, and a true conviction that I’m in relationship with a loving God. I have the opportunity each day to bring a heart of service into every interaction. Where this leads, is not nearly as important to me as how much joy I will experience traveling the road to happy destiny.
Investing in loving relationships makes my heart sing. Holding safe space for women to heal from their traumas feels more meaningful to me than anything I’ve previously experienced in my life’s journey. Restoration and healing are not afforded to everyone. When you have your next opportunity to hold nonjudgmental, loving, kind, space for another human, take it. Expect nothing in return and see how that makes you feel in your heart. We can all make a difference, simply by loving well.
My fervent belief is that when we get to the end of our journey, knowing that we have loved well and heavily invested in our relationships, we become the richest of humans.